TELL YOUR MOM I WOULD HAVE BEEN HAPPY TO PAY HER, HAD THE RIMJOB BEEN OF HIGHER QUALITY

Thursday, January 13, 2005

You're Talking To The Person Behind Me, Right?

We got a new guy at work, and he's a real happy asshole - nice to everybody, always smiling, waves when he see's you, exudes empathy, etc. Anyway, this fucking guy Invited me to his house to eat dinner with him and his wife this weekend, and I could 'bring a date'. I don't know if he was fucking with me that crack. I told him I have to check my schedule (my schedule is actually this, from now until I die, with the exception of work, every single day is free). Although the guy is giving me a grade a case of the heebie jeebies being so nice to me for no real reason, and usually the though of eating with a stranger and his wife gives me vivid nightmares, getting to demolish a homecooked meal instead of the swill I normally ingest might be nice. I just don't know what I am going to do.

I drank eight of those surgery Starbuck's cold prepackaged mocha bullshit coffee things, and now I feel like I have a horrible disease.

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