TELL YOUR MOM I WOULD HAVE BEEN HAPPY TO PAY HER, HAD THE RIMJOB BEEN OF HIGHER QUALITY

Saturday, November 13, 2004

Hey Asshole, Fuck You

So, a reader sent me a link to some dipshit named Tim Ellison's blog, 'Music Chamber'. Those of you who are not fans of shitty blogs are advised to look elsewhere. Otherwise, you can check it out at:
www.musicchamber.blogspot.com
In his latest entry, Ellison is bitching about Bush winning the election, and he mentions the low voter turnout for 18-24 year olds. Quite the scoop, Timmy. Anyway, a submit a quote, "[there was a] 35% voter turnout for 18-24 year old eligible voters IN THIS ELECTION. What a fucking video game playing, teevee-addled, braindead generation of MORONS."

Far be it from me to defend the American 18-24 year old. I figure we can randomly decapitate a good quarter of them and it will improve daily life immeasurably, not to mention cutting down on traffic a considerable amount. But for Ellison, who I assume is in his forties (because he just seems like a mildly befuddled middle aged dipshit), to bitch about that demographic in terms of Bush winning... It's a bit unfair. Tim, I got a question for you: WHOSE FUCKING AGE GROUP IS VOTING FOR BUSH IN THE FIRST PLACE, DIMWIT?

Then again, a random selection of quotes:

"But as time goes by, I've come to realize that this might actually be my favorite R.E.M. song OF ALL."
I didn't make that up.

"I've enjoyed both of the Robert Christgau reviews of SMiLE"
Good for you, Tim.

"I think my find of the year right now is the 10,000 Maniacs CD"
What were your other finds?

"I think I'm going to take the plunge and buy a SWA album"
Good luck with that.

"*goes and puts first A Flock of Seagulls album on the stereo again *"
Have some self respect.

"I own a copy of A-Frames 2. I just did a fairly extensive sampling of the tracks on both the Rapture's Echoes album and A-Frames 2 together and I will now report: I CANNOT POSSIBLY IMAGINE how anyone could listen to these two albums together and tell me that the A-Frames album is better."
Does it really stretch the boundries of imagination that much?

"The dissonance evokes the machine because mechanical sounds, of course, are not always diatonic."
Fuck no, they aren't!

"I NOW FORMALLY QUESTION THE PUNK ROCK CANON. I was at the record store a couple of days ago and they were playing the Saints' Eternally Yours. You know, I must say that it just sounded unambitious and kind of drab to me."
Not like the Rapture, Interpol, Yeah Yeah Yeahs, R.E.M., SWA, Cynidi Lauper, Michael Jackson, Toto, Phil Collins, Stereolab, Belle & Sebastian, Andrew W.K. or your find of the year, 10,000 Maniacs?

"Thanks to JB, by the way, for the burns on the Rapture, Interpol, and Yeah Yeah Yeahs CDs!"
Thanks.

"It occurred to me yesterday that Abba has seemingly had virtually no play at all on U.S. radio as oldies music."
Yes.

"'...whether it was Madonna's hits, or "Time After Time" by Cyndi Lauper, or Michael Jackson, or "Africa" by Toto, or "Inside Out" by Phil Collins'... Yeah, I like that stuff"
Good for you.

"This subject of pop music led me back to Stereolab--a rare indie group (started as an indie group, anyway) with real songwriting integrity. I wonder if Belle and Sebastian, despite the stylistic differences, are post-Stereolab? Is that where the element of well-written songs comes from?"
Wait, what was the question?

"Andrew W.K.'s poor showing in Pazz and Jop this year is quite remarkable"
Oh yeah?

"And are Andrew [W.K.]'s inspirational speaker-style lyrics and singing any less remarkable and extraordinary this year than they were last year?"
No.

Not someone I get along with eye to eye...

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